Studio 5: My Funny Valentines

Way back in 2012, I did a Valentine segment for Studio 5 featuring projects from the Hardware store and perfect for the man in your life.

Well, this year I decided it would be fun to come up with a whole new bunch of creative cards, this time, with a funny bone. 

I immediately had a few good ideas, but then got kind of stumped.  It took several weeks for me to come up with ideas for you that were neither inappropriate for tv viewers (and me too!) or totally cornball!  I also tried to create projects that touched on different people at different times of their lives.  Married, single and loving it, single and hating it, tech geeks, cheeky and yes, even one slightly cornball card.  I couldn't resist.

This first one is perfect for the 'old married couple'.  I found this quote, which is really quite romantic and lovely and would do perfectly for a straight, unabashed valentine card, but it was just begging to be made fun of.  Success!

Having spent quite a bit of time in airports of late, I noticed tons of these digital squares. 

They are called QR Codes (Quick Response codes) and believe me you will see these more and more.  Newspapers, magazines, ads, bulletin boards etc...

To read these codes you scan them with your smart phone.  You will first have to download a free QR reader (which are free).  If your recipient doesn't have one, load it while they aren't looking, you know, when they are actually separated from their phone...like in the shower!  LOL

To create your own personal QR code you use a QR code generator.  I used this one, but google it and there are tons.  You can create a QR code that will lead you to a webpage, a text message or note on your phone.

If you want the one you see on my phone, guess what?  Just scan in the image you see and you'll go right to it.  So cool.

Once you've created your custom QR code, just save it and paste it in a word document, print and fold.  Love how simple and techie this is.

I found this joke, laughed out loud and then started working on images.  I knew it would be hard, but then found this illustration by Ron Leishman.  Perfection!

I had to buy the image, but got permission from Ron for you all to download the card, print and use personally...yes, please don't sell it to Hallmark! :) 

He gave the TV to me for free!  He is awesome and prolific and has a great website (actually, several) called toon-a-day.  Let's repay his kindness by signing up for his free service.  This would make a great girlfriend or anti-valentine card (more on that later).

So, after I finally finished my projects and photographed them, I called my two daughters down to see their reaction to the projects. 

I was frankly relieved...success!  Mind you, they are 16 and 20!  But I'm 48 and it worked for me.

This card made them smile, then after they opened it, I got that precious, "ahhhhhh".  If you can get 2 emotions out of one card, you've got a winner.

Love how simple this card is, not to mention how free-ing it was to break a pencil ON PURPOSE.  (note: used 1/2" glue dots to secure the pencil in place.)

Ready for cornball?  Yup, here we go!  I just couldn't resist, since us Neals have a thing for chickens. 

I also have this fun, fancy chicken version of this card which is actually kind of funnier, but I really wanted to put a heart in the center of a chicken silhouette.  I get in those moods sometimes.

Gee, I really want this chicken.  Steve?  Are you listening?

Here's another techie card.  My 20-year-old loved it, she got really effusive about how much she loves her phone.

I love mine too.  Hard to part with it.

Sometimes just putting the phone down or even turning it off is a sign of true love.  Or maybe just politeness?

Can it get simpler than this?  Print and fold.  Great card for a man, because you know how many men actually read my blog?

So maybe you just need to pass it around for me.

Studies show that couples should kiss at least 5 seconds a day.  At least that's what my husband told me (wink, wink).

Actually, there really are a ton of great reasons to kiss and if you'd like to know what they all are (and WOW, wouldn't this be a great QR link to send your loved one), please visit the best kissing website...don't worry, nothing inappropriate here, very cute.

Here's a cute way to create a little kissing anticipation.  Tie a cellophane bag with the tag or tuck a single lemon in your partner's lunch for a fun surprise.

Don't like lemons?  Try sour candy or a jar of pickles!

This Valentine is dedicated to my math geek son who is getting married this spring.

I have to tell you, this one got the biggest and longest laugh last night with my girls.  Why?  Emma's (my 20 year old) face screwed up in concentration as she tried to do the math.  Priceless!! (note:  Be sure to place the tags in order so they are read in the right order).

The whole time I was working on this project I had Pat Benatar singing in my head.

For those of you too young to know what an awesome rocker Benatar was, listen to her on youtube and while you're there, listen to the rest of her amazing 80's music.

For this little play on words, you'll need:

• One 60 cc syringe
• bag of valetine M&Ms
• Heart pick
• Printed tag

You probably won't find this larger syringe at a basic pharmacy.  I got mine from Taylor Drug by the American Fork Hospital.  Costs me .60 cents.  Look for a dedicated pharmacy, usually by a hospital or medical center.

 I've had this little Valentine ditty for years and it still makes me laugh.

It's another one of those anti-valentine projects.  So, what, exactly is that?  Here's a great explanation in the form of a joke by comedian Lewis Black,

"Valentine's Day: the feel-good holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone."

This way, people without a special someone get to celebrate too...and eat chocolate, and laugh.

Back to the project:  I printed everything on plain white printer paper so it would be easier to roll and crinkle.

Any bottle will do.  Just tape one end down and roll.  Tie ribbon around to secure.  Fill bottle with Lindt balls.  I tucked a bit of red tulle in the top before the final message so you can't see the balls.  Take final message and wrap around one Lindt ball and tuck it at the top of the bottle.

For the intellectual or philosopher in your life, here's a perfect card, because you have to think a bit before it's funny.  

I'm neither, but these glasses crack me up!

Got them at a dollar store for $2.  Just print the card (not a folding one), punch the sides where the glasses will fold over and tape in place in the back.

I still remember Comedian Rita Rudner telling this joke.  Priceless.

Not sure there is a real connection between the joke and this bandit/cupid, but I had to use him, he's just too funny.

And what is even funnier, is that I had to photoshop a fun...YES, a gun, out of his other hand, because, well, that was just too weird.












I'm leaving the strangest card for last.

And if you think I have finally lost what is left of my brain, then you obviously don't have teens or young adults in your life.

Zombies are very trendy.

So, in keeping with the younger crowd, here is my version of a valentine zombie card.




Phew!  I'm done!  All 13 projects and as always, I try to keep my cards for Studio 5 quick and ridiculously easy.  Why?  Because I know not all of you make cards.  But chances are good you have a computer and a printer and someone you want to give a valentine card to.

So, visit my download website and pick one that suits your needs.  Jpegs are on the main page, but if you want the PDF files for easy print and fold, follow the PDF tag on top of the page.

Happy Funny Valentine's Day!  Sue